Sexy Poker™
Publisher: Gameloft
Players: 1
ESRB Rating: M (Mature) - Simulated Gambling, Suggestive Themes
Price: 500 Wii Points

Some people claim that Nintendo Wii is for the kids, but with titles like MadWorld, No More Heroes and Sexy Poker, I have to say that the Wii actually has some completely adult-themed games.  While this game doesn’t have any actual nudity, I’d say that children should NOT play this title.  If you are an adult interested in this type of game, read on…

Nintendo’s Official Description:

Get your pulse racing with a game of strip poker against a selection of six lovely manga-style women who may wind up in nothing but swimsuits or underwear when the final hand is dealt. Choose the classic Texas Hold’em Poker to be thrilled as the bets increase, or try the Black Jack game for a mix of chance and strategy. Discover the girls’ personalities: they’ll bluff you! Enter the photo gallery to see the pictures you’ve unlocked by playing and winning. If you’re good enough, Emi, Sakura and their seductive girlfriends will bet their clothes to stay in the game.

When I first heard about Sexy Poker, I was under the belief that Gameloft would be bringing us a “photo-realistic” manga-style strip poker game.  What we actually got was a manga-style strip-like poker game.  After playing the game for a short period of time, I found myself completely bored, despite the eye candy.  They say “sex sells” and that will be the only reason anyone will buy this game for 500 Wii Points.

Graphics/Audio (10/25)

The graphics and audio are the high point of the game, yet still a disappointment.

Gameplay (5/25)

Gameplay… What gameplay?  This game plays kind of like a regular Texas Hold ‘Em, but with no options or variations.  This is barebones poker with a quasi-strip twist.  While playing, you automatically win once your opponent is down to their underwear; regardless of how much money they have left.  The gameplay is more boring that I’m making it out to be…

Creativity (5/25)

This game is about as creative as a rock stuck to the bottom of my flip-flop.

Fun Factor (5/25)

When you are bored, it is hard to have fun.

Overall (25/100)

This is probably the worst poker game I have played in a very long time.  If you love playing cards, free flash games on the web are a better option for you.  I’m sure there are better strip games out there, but I wouldn’t know about that!